Oh sweet Jesus have I been fencing. And writing papers – so many papers. But let’s focus on the fencing.

Ladies and gentlemen, behold! I am officially the worst male epeeist to attend the Midwestern Fencing Championships at Notre Dame: 0-7, 35th out of 35, baby, though a couple bouts were very close. The team did alright though: 8th out of 14. But the point is, ‘twas most fun, and educational. For example, I learned:

-Everyone has matching socks, but only Oberlin’s fencers are crazy enough to wear matching rainbow socks.
-That said, only Chicago’s men’s epee team was crazy enough to wear matching Burger King crowns. I was the Archduke of Bohemia. Said crowns were obtained in Hegewisch. Why Hegewisch, you ask? Well…
-The 6:15 Friday South Shore train does not run all the way to South Bend, but the train 90 minutes behind it does, and the best way to get that one is to stop over at Hegewisch, on the Indiana border.
-MSU’s fencing team is nearly as cool as ours, and was fun to play Mafia with.
-Gold medal sabreists are really, really good at what they do. Got to see the roommate of everyone’s favorite Irishperson in action. Very impressive. I intended to say hi, but I didn’t get the opportunity.
-U of C students will discuss metaphysics at the drop of a hat, although how we got to that topic from computer games I still don’t know.